Boldly Go Solo

Solo tai chi and cooking classes in Vietnam

My friend and former work colleague "P," used to rush from work some evenings to make it to her tai chi class. She found it to be a relaxing respite from work tasks and household duties.

When she and her husband booked a trip to Vietnam this past December, she decided she was going to take the opportunity to practice tai chi in a place where it was a common pastime.

So while on vacation, she left husband M behind and headed to a park in the wee hours of the morning to participate in a public tai chi session. Here's her story:

"I have done what I came to do. Achieved my minor dream. Gone out on my own, with the help of a guide, to Hoan Kiem Lake (pronounced Juan Kim) that is to Hanoi what Central Park is to New York.

And there, at 6 in the morning, just as the sun is coming up (though, it doesn't feel like a sunrise since it's overcast and drizzling and pretty dark even when it's daylight), my guide steers me past the doubles teams playing badminton (yes, badminton is still alive and well somewhere in this world) and the men lifting barbells to groups of ladies doing tai chi.

This is what I wanted to do: Tai Chi in a park in an Asian city.

Solo sightseeing in Can Tho, Vietnam

My friend P, and her husband M, are in Vietnam, sweating through a very non-white Christmas season. The white stuff wouldn't last a second in Southeast Asia if it ever managed to head that way. It's broiling hot, she says.

Between the heat and the fumes from the "hundreds of thousands of mopeds that fill the roads at all hours," on the streets of Can Tho, a big city on the Mekong Delta, P felt a little woozy.

She decided to pass on a pre-planned bike ride. M went, which meant P could explore the back streets on her own. Which she LOVED.

She emailed me from an Internet cafe, another thing that's difficult to indulge in when you're traveling with others. They either have to want to use email too, or you have to make them wait for you, or you have to arrange to meet them somewhere when you're done.

And then you have to make sure you're done when you said you'd be done or you're making them wait. Details, details, that you don't have to deal with when you're on you're own. 

Anyway, she wrote that for the afternoon, she was "boldly going solo" for two hours. With someone she called a "guide in training." So she had the company of a Thai local. "It's more interesting because I can ask the questions I want to ask without M going off on his tangents."

See, my faithful readers, even the person who's nearest and dearest to your heart, that traveling companion you supposedly can count on, can get in your way. Or on your nerves.

It's not always a blessing to have that familiar person by your side, as I've said before.

Travel's better the first time around and solo travel brings you a lot of firsts

Last year around this time I wrote about holiday markets around the world. The post was prompted by a visit to Washington, D.C.'s holiday market.

The other day, I went back to the D.C. market. I have to admit, the second time was not as exciting.

That's the thing about travel for me. I always want to see something new. I want to go to a city or country I haven't been to rather than one I've already visited. Even if there's plenty left to see in places I've been.

Which is probably why I'm often a solo traveler. I only have so many travel days and so much money to spend. And, to get right down to it, only so many healthy years for traveling. (I don't know that number but I know it's not forever.)

So I want each experience to have great potential for discovery and not be too much of a repeat.

If I had to find a travel companion for every trip, I'd need to find someone who wants to go where I want to go and travel the way I want to travel. Good luck with that.

This winter, I have an opportunity to go on an inexpensive trip to Thailand with my travel writers' group. But I've been to Thailand.

I loved it and I highly recommend it. But it's a long way to go to see many of the things I've already seen. Don't get me wrong. I think I would thoroughly enjoy myself.

But such a trip also would alter wonderful memories I already have and it would take time and money from a more special trip to someplace new.

So I'm going to pass and dream on about China, or Japan, or some other country I haven't been. This is a choice I can make only because I'm willing to travel solo to live my travel dreams.